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The Lessons of "E" and Vanguard Vol. 1, No. 6 * 11 December 2008  By JCI Mem. EMI ROSE R. PARCON2009 President
I am forced.
Before, life didn't have to.
Now, it had to.
I used to have a bi-yearly evaluation of my goals.
I forgot when exactly I developed the habit.
But, I guess I was 17 then, around the time that I first read Stephen Covey's Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.
Not only did I create New Year's Resolutions, I made a list of people who I want to thank for the year and compiled the reasons why I'm grateful for them. I also re-assessed what's important to me, evaluated how I define my happiness. I also created goals while revisiting the personal mission statement I created.
I did that, too, every June, just in time for my birthday.
This year, I postponed starting it at the beginning of December (it usually takes me a month to contemplate and write about everything). I was so consumed with Urgent/Important stuff. I even missed doing last week's column.
LIFE: "Hey, you should be doing this now"
But Life, perhaps, got so used to my habit. It gave me one HUGE, painful reminder of what I should be doing. I almost lost a lot of things in its attempt to make me remember. Life, the Universe, God, Jesus, Allah, Buddha, or whoever you prefer to call that omnipotent being that gives you graces, gave me an experience that FORCED me heavily to really assess how I should be moving forward with my life.
It almost took a lot of things I hold just to make me realize where my treasures really lie.
For a week, I was in a daze, alternating between thinking about the urgent projects at hand (we have three major projects this month), and rethinking about my life on a larger perspective. This month really is a test of my ability to compartmentalize and to detach myself, and to remember the lesson that "just because it is, it doesn't mean it should be." It is a test for a lot of things, including my ability to let go, let things slide, delegate, motivate, communicate and maintain friendships.
Due to the necessity of assessing things in my life and due to the number of things I have to handle this month, I am forced to be situational, too.
I must admit, I've disappointed some members when I had to let them be and not be available to them for their projects as much as they want me to be.
I'm just glad that I've deposited enough in their emotional bank accounts that they didn't really let their disappointments demotivate them (assuming kaayo ko, noh). I am forced to, actually. Or I'll burn myself out, if not make myself permanently psychotic. But my members understand (Assuming na sad!).
I love Read to Lead. The advocacy lived in my heart long before the project was conceptualized. I love Kasadya. It gave me lots of insights about my capabilities and solidified my friendship with Mai. But I have to become "presidential" now and to stop thinking like a project chairperson. The people running those projects are not only motivated, they are also capable. And another project needed my attention. So I had to be situational. I had to be a Vanguard Leader. I should be laissez faire with those two projects and be a bit autocratic with the other.
I could sense the disappointment the project chairpersons of those projects had at the onset. I must admit, too, that I was not very good in explaining my actions / "withdrawal." I should have done better than assume that they'll see the reasons of my actions even if I don't explain it to them. But things are good now. And we're in a better place. They saw the trust I placed on them more than my seeming withdrawal of support.
All these gave me, gave us, lots of reasons to do a quarterly evaluation and to maximize on the learnings we have for the past three months. We have to live the E in SAPAE, after all.
Dayon jud ta, guys, ha. It will be a wonderful overnight thing again. I promise.
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